


The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Loved

by IT_CAME_FROM_MUD



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Edward is an asshole who can’t see his own feelings, I never said they were healthy, M/M, but damn if i don’t love angsty pining, egomaniac bitch, this is a rewrite from that scene from the Pena Dura episode, yall know the one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-04
Updated: 2020-02-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:02:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22553695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IT_CAME_FROM_MUD/pseuds/IT_CAME_FROM_MUD
Summary: Ed and Oswald meet once again under less than ideal circumstances, and the Riddler only wants to hear one thing.
Relationships: Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma, Riddler/Penguin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 45





	The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Loved

“You paid Hugo Strange to save me.” He knew this, he knew this, he knew this. It was the one thing all parts of him knew. “Why?” He knew this. They both knew it. 

And just like that, Oswald deflated. Not mayor, not kingpin, just a guilty child caught in a wrongdoing. 

“You know why.” Of course he knew why. When Gotham stumbled into Hell, he still knew. It was the only constant thing in his mess of a life, for God’s sake. Ed leveled his gun, pressing it between Oswald’s wide eyes.

“I want to hear you say it.” Not again. Please not again. It made his stomach drop everytime he heard it, please god don’t make him hear it again. Oswald took a step back. 

“No.” It came out so small that Ed didn’t even see Oswald’s lips move. Oswald was moving away from him. He was so afraid and it was all so wrong. Ed felt himself start to shake, gun rattling unsteadily in his hand. 

“Say it again!” His voice splintered in two, the words drying his mouth even as he yelled them. God please don’t do it, please don’t hurt me again. 

Oswald paused, searching Nygma’s face for some memory of his former glory. For a second, he almost said it. And he still would have meant it. Instead, he just laughed, loud and mean. 

“No, I don’t think I will.” 

“What?” Ed rasped and shuddered like some broken machine, doomed to freeze and break forever. Ed lowered his gun. 

This was a thousand times worse than what he had imagined. At least there was familiar pain when he thought about what Oswald had said all that time ago. This felt so much worse.

“I have said it,” Oswald took a step forward, the gun poking into his chest. “Time and time again, old friend.” Ed took a step back, as if each word was a cut to his skin. “But you,” Oswald smiled, even as anger twisted the corners of his mouth. “The self-proclaimed smartest man in Gotham, never listened.” 

This was it. The worst Ed had felt in a very long time. Worse than when Oswald had betrayed him that first time. No, he never would have reciprocated Oswald’s feelings. Ever. But it had done wonders for his ego, to be...admired by the most dangerous man in Gotham. He was always worthy of Oswald’s affection, because Oswald chose him, time and time again. No one else had ever received anything like it. Ed had known the feeling for years, and it was his worst addiction yet.  
“You could have heard it if you just paid attention, Ed. God, could I have made it more obvious?” Oswald laughed again. “I have a theory, and, stop me if I’m wrong, but I think you just didn’t want to hear it.” No. That’s not true, this Ed also knows. He had no idea, and if he did then things would have been very different. 

No! Things would have been the same! Oswald was selfish and he would have found new ways to ruin Ed, no matter what. 

“You didn’t believe that someone could ever love you.” There it was, the most unpleasant thrill. “Because for all your preening, Ed, you were still just that little guy at the GCPD.” Oswald took one step closer, but Ed was too hurt to pull away. Oswald’s breath tickled his face.

“That pathetic little nerd that nobody could ever love. Especially not someone like me.” The anger died as he spoke, but Oswald did not move away. They looked at each other, and at last Oswald cleared his throat and continued.

“Well I did. I really did.” He drew a shaky breath, once again looking like a lost child looking for comfort. “Happy, Ed?” He wiped furiously at his eyes, too mad at himself to even look at Ed. 

Ed felt his hand drop to his sides, now nothing pressing between him and the Penguin. Only them, like it should be. 

“No.”


End file.
